tough question

[swampdragon]

All of this talk about the ignorance of Akin has got me wondering.

I also noticed that in the past many posters would be comfortable making the difficult decision of shooting someone if they broke into their house - I could not do that.

So - what would you do if your fifteen year old daughter became pregnant?

This would be a very tough decision for people that support abortion as well as people that don't

[joncarlos]

You mean, after shooting the someone who broke into, well, never mind.

I honestly don't know, and I suspect most people don't, but I think we would consider all of the possible options. I wouldn't take anything off the table.

[B-Fly]

I'll be honest. I would almost certainly hope that she would elect to abort. I do not want my daughter becoming a mother at 15 and I don't think her life plans should be ruined/altered because of a stupid mistake at age 15. I would, of course, discuss it with my wife first, then the two of us would have a long conversation with our daughter about all of her options, and I would support her whatever she ultimately chose to do, but I'm pretty sure my advice would lean very strongly against having the baby.

[senorsheep]

I'll be honest. I would almost certainly hope that she would elect to abort. I do not want my daughter becoming a mother at 15 and I don't think her life plans should be ruined/altered because of a stupid mistake at age 15. I would, of course, discuss it with my wife first, then the two of us would have a long conversation with our daughter about all of her options, and I would support her whatever she ultimately chose to do, but I'm pretty sure my advice would lean very strongly against having the baby.

This.

[DMT]

I'll be honest. I would almost certainly hope that she would elect to abort. I do not want my daughter becoming a mother at 15 and I don't think her life plans should be ruined/altered because of a stupid mistake at age 15. I would, of course, discuss it with my wife first, then the two of us would have a long conversation with our daughter about all of her options, and I would support her whatever she ultimately chose to do, but I'm pretty sure my advice would lean very strongly against having the baby.

Same here.

[swampdragon]

I'll be honest. I would almost certainly hope that she would elect to abort. I do not want my daughter becoming a mother at 15 and I don't think her life plans should be ruined/altered because of a stupid mistake at age 15. I would, of course, discuss it with my wife first, then the two of us would have a long conversation with our daughter about all of her options, and I would support her whatever she ultimately chose to do, but I'm pretty sure my advice would lean very strongly against having the baby.

I too agree with this sentiment but the question for me is how far would I go to convince her to have an abortion. I might go far enough demanding that she do it and possibly wrecking our relationship so that she doesn't wreck her own life by having a baby at 15.

[B-Fly]

I too agree with this sentiment but the question for me is how far would I go to convince her to have an abortion. I might go far enough demanding that she do it and possibly wrecking our relationship so that she doesn't wreck her own life by having a baby at 15.

I don't think I could demand that she get an abortion against her will or otherwise threaten her with punitive action should she decide to have the baby. I would chew her out pretty good, however, if it appeared she was downplaying the degree of difficulty and the size of the responsibility she would be taking on.

[swampdragon]

I don't think I could demand that she get an abortion against her will or otherwise threaten her with punitive action should she decide to have the baby. I would chew her out pretty good, however, if it appeared she was downplaying the degree of difficulty and the size of the responsibility she would be taking on.

thats why the "might" comes into play - I cant really answer how far I would go suggesting it

I am curious to know how far someone who doesn't believe in abortion would go to keep her from not having one - maybe the same conviction?

[B-Fly]

thats why the "might" comes into play - I cant really answer how far I would go suggesting it

I am curious to know how far someone who doesn't believe in abortion would go to keep her from not having one - maybe the same conviction?

I would expect that someone who is anti-abortion would go further, since a pro-choice position generally includes honoring the pregnant woman's choice to have a baby, regardless of what we'd choose to do ourselves were we in her shoes. It sounds like we're not just pro-choice but pro-abortion when the question is about our own 15-year-old daughter, but if I honestly believe (and I do) in reproductive freedom, then I have to accept that it includes my own daughter's freedom to make what I'd view as a bad choice.

[In the Corn]

So is adoption out of the question?

My daughter is 15, right now. She, like every teen, is starting to lose her brain, but I think she knows that sex at her age is not a great idea.

I pray that she never has to go through this decision-making process. My guidance to her would be that she has to make a choice. She has three options, keep the baby, give the baby up for adoption or have an abortion. Ivy is well aware of the lasting effects have on people that have chosen to have an abortion. Women that I know still grieve the day they decided to abort their child (fetus).

I would loving let her know that her mom and I would support her in the choice and weigh what each on looks like for the future.

I have seen first hand many young women walking into a social service to sign the paperwork to give their child up for adoption, and I know it is difficult, but they felt it right.

With open adoption, the potential to be involved in the child's life is open to whatever the birth parents and adoptive parents agree. My best friend had a child when he was in high school and he and the mother gave the child up for adoption. He still visits, as he calls him, "my son".

IMO, adoption should be the first choice.

[In the Corn]

Totally didn't get that from swampy's original post, inferring the rape situation.

I'm heading out, but I'll try and get back on later tonight.

[B-Fly]

So is adoption out of the question?

Adoption would be my second choice. I don't doubt that there are women who come to regret profoundly a decision to abort a pregnancy, but I honestly believe the frequency of that is way overblown by those who are anti-abortion. I think that carrying an unwanted pregnancy to term while still in high school and then giving that child up for adoption would, for the vast majority of teenage girls, be far, far more physically and psychologically traumatic - and yes, lasting - than a first trimester abortion. I respect the fact that you believe personhood begins at conception. I don't. And that obviously has a huge influence on our respective feelings about this.

[swampdragon]

Totally didn't get that from swampy's original post, inferring the rape situation.

I'm heading out, but I'll try and get back on later tonight.

No - the rape situation is not relevant right now (it just put the idea in my head)- just trying to get straight forward answers

[senorsheep]

IMO, adoption should be the first choice.

It's very different in the case of rape, though. Encouraging a rape victim to carry to term a baby that was forcibly implanted in her by some scumbag - that would be like making her re-live her rape every day for nine months, and likely beyond, wouldn't it? I mean, if the victim wants to do it, and can handle it psychologically, great for her, but I'm not sure how many 15-year-old girls could handle that, or should be encouraged to do so. That is asking a hell of a lot more than to take responsibility for some ill-advised teen sex.

Edit to add: Just saw your update that you missed the rape angle. Looking forward to your thoughts through that perspective.

[Gregg]

All of this talk about the ignorance of Akin has got me wondering.

I also noticed that in the past many posters would be comfortable making the difficult decision of shooting someone if they broke into their house - I could not do that.

So - what would you do if your fifteen year old daughter became pregnant?

This would be a very tough decision for people that support abortion as well as people that don't

I am not writing this in a snarky way, I would guess those who support abortion this would be a simple answer of yes. Abortion is a means of getting rid of an unwanted pregnancy. Simple as that. Easy answer to a tough circumstance. Who wants their 15 year old to get pregnant?

For those of us who are against abortion, the temptation might be to change our stance in the event of our 15 year old getting pregnant. I would find this hypocritical and would hope that I would never fall to that. I believe I would opt for adoption, but would also support keeping the baby (with our help of course). When all the labor pains are gone, and the egos are finished being bruised, there lies the miracle of birth. A new born heals many ills. Being a parent is always a hard job, but for many it is well worth it. I also would guess that the maturity level of the 15 year old would come into play regarding the keeping and raising of the child.

One thing I wouldn't do is yell at, demean, or do what ever angry parents do when a child/teen is behaving badly. This is not the time for that. This is the time for grace, kindness, and support.