I finally got a physical, my 2nd one in 20 years. im glad the doctor accepted to see me. but then afterwards i started thinking he's gay. and he wants me to know this just in case im anti-gay and have some kneejerk reaction when i realize it. actually i'd rather have a gay doctor because then there's no homophobia when he has to check out your junk. isn't that weird? which is why i like the idea of having a female doctor. but then that has problems too.
the first question was what my sexual orientation was. and i didn't think anything of it. i sat there and proudly announced that i was straight with a smile. like there was nothing wrong with me. so that could've come out better. so im thinking he's checking on my mental state too. they ask you questions like whether your depressed and stuff, and if i was gay, that would be added pressure based on how society has been behaving. then he asks if im sexual active. that's a standard question. more important for women than men tho cause their parts are more complex. and again the answer was no. which i think im trying to win some award in. heh. then he asks me if im concerned about AIDS. this question i almost aced cause i said, 'oh no, i got tested for that in the 80's when it was all the rage'. and he smiled about that. i thought ok, he needed to know if i think i have hiv because nurses will be drawing blood from me. but then now if he's gay then i just belittled the aids epidemic in the gay community.
he wasn't very good with sports either. i smoke cigarettes and i developed 2 black dots one on my bottom lip and another below my nose right above it. i imagine it's no different from developing spots on your lungs. so it's pre-cancer. so he mentions Michael Douglas, like he got cancer from smoking. tho i didn't say the word cunilingus, but i tried to correct him. so then he mentions Curt Schilling's cancer which i told him a better example is Tony Gwynn cause Curt Schilling is a fucking redneck. tho i didn't say that about Schilling. i mentioned how Ernie Zampese would smoke a lot and that i needed to change my whole lifestyle in order to quit smoking. which im trying to do. so that was more sports stuff which he knew even less about.
then there was other things how i said im not really interested in quitting smoking, and whether that bothered him. and he briefly referred to himself as a bleeding heart liberal trying to help or cure ppl. tho i think he was actually trying to get me to talk about politics there. which even tho im liberal, i learned a lot from being on rotojunkie in the sports bar. politics is not worth it. you learn what its all about then you keep it to your vest. let everyone discover their stuff in their own time.
i think it was because i mentioned my cat at one point and then started balling my eye's out. it's a strange thing to be handed kleenexes when you're a guy. the female vet did for me once, and he also did. tho there i am getting my snots all over the place so it could've been a hygiene thing.
im good a being dumb. and when it comes to gays i really am dumb. i just don't notice it unless it's obvious. and i kind of look at it like a racial thing, like there is no difference. but being gay and being black are kind of different things. gays want you to know. while blacks don't need to tell you. my main issue was hygiene tho. i have a genital wart, and after i dropped my drawers and touched my junk to show him, i think i started touching my face and head and shit without washing my hands. i noticed after the physical and he took of his gloves he was furiously washing his hands in the sink. so on the follow check up, he reached out to shake my hand and i paused and said 'i washed my hands', before shaking his hand. i think the most important thing is to keep a clean doctors office.
i know im not gay. sometimes i wish i was. I've looked at gay porn, it doesn't work for me. and it's terrible porn. it's totally unimaginative too. for a brief moment i thought i'd say i liked shemales maybe. but that's not reality. that's a creation of the porn industry. transsexuals are real, but real ones look like guys. and that doesn't work.
the guy is young, smart, handsome, neat, clean, etc.. im pretty sure he's gay. is it really my responsibility to acknowledge it? do gay doctors really need to know that their straight patients know and are ok with it? can't i do what i always do and just be dumb? im really good at being dumb. it comes natural. i'd rather not see a difference.
the first question was what my sexual orientation was. and i didn't think anything of it. i sat there and proudly announced that i was straight with a smile. like there was nothing wrong with me. so that could've come out better. so im thinking he's checking on my mental state too. they ask you questions like whether your depressed and stuff, and if i was gay, that would be added pressure based on how society has been behaving. then he asks if im sexual active. that's a standard question. more important for women than men tho cause their parts are more complex. and again the answer was no. which i think im trying to win some award in. heh. then he asks me if im concerned about AIDS. this question i almost aced cause i said, 'oh no, i got tested for that in the 80's when it was all the rage'. and he smiled about that. i thought ok, he needed to know if i think i have hiv because nurses will be drawing blood from me. but then now if he's gay then i just belittled the aids epidemic in the gay community.
he wasn't very good with sports either. i smoke cigarettes and i developed 2 black dots one on my bottom lip and another below my nose right above it. i imagine it's no different from developing spots on your lungs. so it's pre-cancer. so he mentions Michael Douglas, like he got cancer from smoking. tho i didn't say the word cunilingus, but i tried to correct him. so then he mentions Curt Schilling's cancer which i told him a better example is Tony Gwynn cause Curt Schilling is a fucking redneck. tho i didn't say that about Schilling. i mentioned how Ernie Zampese would smoke a lot and that i needed to change my whole lifestyle in order to quit smoking. which im trying to do. so that was more sports stuff which he knew even less about.
then there was other things how i said im not really interested in quitting smoking, and whether that bothered him. and he briefly referred to himself as a bleeding heart liberal trying to help or cure ppl. tho i think he was actually trying to get me to talk about politics there. which even tho im liberal, i learned a lot from being on rotojunkie in the sports bar. politics is not worth it. you learn what its all about then you keep it to your vest. let everyone discover their stuff in their own time.
i think it was because i mentioned my cat at one point and then started balling my eye's out. it's a strange thing to be handed kleenexes when you're a guy. the female vet did for me once, and he also did. tho there i am getting my snots all over the place so it could've been a hygiene thing.
im good a being dumb. and when it comes to gays i really am dumb. i just don't notice it unless it's obvious. and i kind of look at it like a racial thing, like there is no difference. but being gay and being black are kind of different things. gays want you to know. while blacks don't need to tell you. my main issue was hygiene tho. i have a genital wart, and after i dropped my drawers and touched my junk to show him, i think i started touching my face and head and shit without washing my hands. i noticed after the physical and he took of his gloves he was furiously washing his hands in the sink. so on the follow check up, he reached out to shake my hand and i paused and said 'i washed my hands', before shaking his hand. i think the most important thing is to keep a clean doctors office.
i know im not gay. sometimes i wish i was. I've looked at gay porn, it doesn't work for me. and it's terrible porn. it's totally unimaginative too. for a brief moment i thought i'd say i liked shemales maybe. but that's not reality. that's a creation of the porn industry. transsexuals are real, but real ones look like guys. and that doesn't work.
the guy is young, smart, handsome, neat, clean, etc.. im pretty sure he's gay. is it really my responsibility to acknowledge it? do gay doctors really need to know that their straight patients know and are ok with it? can't i do what i always do and just be dumb? im really good at being dumb. it comes natural. i'd rather not see a difference.
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