The N Word

[In the Corn]

I've been wanting to post about this for awhile, but wasn't sure how to frame this. I'm Facebook friends with some of my daughter's friends and have noticed that they use the term "nigga" quite liberally. I asked my daughter about this and she she told me that everyone uses the term and it means nothing to them. It's not derogatory towards the person, in some ways, it's a term of endearment for a close friend.

I told my daughter the term is highly offensive, and I don't want her using it, which she totally understand. I haven't heard her use it and hope that when she isn't with me that she doesn't.

I'm left to wonder why these term is used so flippantly by young people. My guess is that rap music has elevated the term and it has lost it's meaning, but I can't believe that is the only reason. This is a phase that needs to stop. I'm imagining this isn't just in flyover country. Do we need a new Roots mini-series to bring racial understanding to a new generation?

[johnnya24]

Being Chris Rock, obviously NSFW

[Stephen]

I think a lot of people just don't think about how that word is hateful to some people. Youth in general is ego-centric and feel that the responsibility is up to everyone else to interpret how they are meaning to use the word when it reality perception and how something is received is often far more important that what the original intent of the user was.

I fill similarly when I hear people say "Man, that joke was gay" as to mean "lame" or "less than" or "Don't be a fag" when people do something that isn't desired. The common response from people when called on it, "Everyone uses it that way. I have friends who are gay." They aren't equating that people find those terms in that context offensive and also hurtful.

I think people also fail to take situation into consideration. For example, I tell off color jokes with certain friends that I wouldn't tell in a room for a strangers or even my family. Facebook makes it all to easy to mix those worlds and propriety and context gets blurred.

Think before you speak has become an antiquated concept.

[DMT]

Louis CK on the 'N' word, NSFW obviously.

[johnnya24]

So I was listening to this track at work one Saturday in the mid-2000's. I was the only one in my office that day ... so I had the music up loud and was merrily singing along to all manner of tracks.



So the chorus is "now I aint sayin' she's a gold digga, but she aint messin' with no broke nigga" ... a black guy from another office walks through as I'm singing the chorus.

Awkward!

[Lucky]

It's difficult to explain to kids sometimes, especially when their African American friends use the word so casually.

I think there is some distinction between "-ah" and "-er", or at least I see the former used more often in print by African Americans.

A friend of ours who played ball for the local university, a very intelligent, thoughtful young man, who has dined in my home many times, changes his facebook profile every single Friday to put up a picture of some young children dancing with the caption "It's Friday, ****ahs!" I never have completely understood, but I see posts from his buddies who think it is hilarious.

Anyway, either form is totally forbidden in this house, and my 15-year old understands that.

[johnnya24]

Louis CK on the 'N' word, NSFW obviously.

The coffee part was brilliant ... and so true.

[BuckyBuckner]

I think back in the early 90s when I was in high school (a tiny private school but one that was easily 80% minorities) in NYC the N word really started to be used by black people and it started out as a way of taking the word back from white people. The idea being that if they used as a term of endearment it's negative connotation would go away. I never used it and will never use it, not even then "-ah" form. I get uncomfortable when I hear it in a song. This could be cause I've heard it used towards friends in it's original meaning.

[DMT]

One of my best friends in junior high (1988-89), who went on to become a national champion in Div 1A wrestling and now coaches kids, got suspended from school for breaking a dipsh!t's nose that used the term derogatorily towards him. Can't recall if the dipsh!t himself got suspended but I don't think so.

[dslaw]

I used the term frequently while growing up in VA. My high school was 90% WASP and most people used the word and the african-americans I was friends with used it so I didn't think anything about it. Going to college I became friends with a guy from NY and I quickly learned that it isn't a word that should be used around him. At first I thought he was being a little sensitive because it's just a word and other people don't have a problem with it. The more I thought about I realized I was being a jerk. Probably haven't used the word in 30 years now and it definitely got my kids in trouble if they ever used it.

[B-Fly]

I cringe every time I hear it. I hear it a lot on the subway and on the street in NYC, mostly from Blacks age 10-30 or so, but also increasingly from Latinos, Asians and Whites in the 10-20 group, too. I'm torn because I appreciate the re-claiming of the word and in most instances it seems to have pretty effectively stripped the word of power among the demographic that uses it. That said, I think it's important that all these kids - and especially the Black kids - have an awareness about the historical context. I hope that within a generation or so the word will fall back out of use. I think the Black community will ultimately decide that, though. If Black parents and community leaders put the kibbosh on it with their kids, kids of other races will very quickly find that they'd better follow suit.

[Gregg]

A lot of good comments here.

I was taught never to use the word and never have. I have taught my kids never to use the word and to my knowledge they do not.

Just because some can "get away" with it doesn't mean they should.

[hacko]

My Nephews are Bi-racial. They were the only Black kids (they and the Government consider themselves black). in an all white school. All state in several sports and idolized by must of their classmates. Once their cousin (white) and at the time a very close friend and teammate made the mistake in a fit of anger calling one of them a "nigger". They have not spoken to him since. That was 12 years ago. At the time I ask my sister-in- law if they were ever going to make up. She said I doubt it . I said I have heard other blacks use it toward each other in fun and in anger. She said that a white person could never ever use that word. In the 20 years my brother was married to her in their many ups and down and sometimes very loud fights he never used the N word. He agree saying that is a line no white person can ever cross.

[johnnya24]

My Nephews are Bi-racial. They were the only Black kids (they and the Government consider themselves black). in an all white school. All state in several sports and idolized by must of their classmates. Once their cousin (white) and at the time a very close friend and teammate made the mistake in a fit of anger calling one of them a "nigger". They have not spoken to him since. That was 12 years ago. At the time I ask my sister-in- law if they were ever going to make up. She said I doubt it . I said I have heard other blacks use it toward each other in fun and in anger. She said that a white person could never ever use that word. In the 20 years my brother was married to her in their many ups and down and sometimes very loud fights he never used the N word. He agree saying that is a line no white person can ever cross.

I can totally see how that would be a complete deal breaker.

[Pogues]

I have had that talk with my son a few times to preempt any mistakes in judgment. He gets it but I do need to watch when I listen to my Bodycount album.