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Had to beat down a tweaker just now...

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  • #1

    Had to beat down a tweaker just now...

    well ok, footsweep and thumb-lock him until the cops showed up.

    I'm on my stoop drinking wine with my dog when tweak stumbles by my house. About 10 feet farther down the street a 10 or 11 year old kid is walking his dog. All of a sudden mr tweak grabs the dogs leash and starts trying to take the dog from the kid. "Hey, hey" the kid says, tweak doesn't let go, then the kid looks at me and says, "Please, can you help me?"

    "Let go of the leash tweak" I say. When he doesn't, I put down my wine glass and tell him, "You've got 2 seconds to walk on". Tweak still won't let go of the kids leash, so I walk up to him, say "Look into my eyes Tweak" and when he does, I footsweep him to the sidewalk, then thumblock him and sit on him until the cops show up.

    Cops are there pretty quick because I guess someone called on him throwing bottles 2 minutes earlier. I told the kid that he did the exact right thing asking for help.

    I hate tweakers.

    Those of you that Twitter are welcome to follow my further drinking adventures by following "On The Stoop".....
    "You know what's wrong with America? If I lovingly tongue a woman's nipple in a movie, it gets an "NC-17" rating, if I chop it off with a machete, it's an "R". That's what's wrong with America, man...."--Dennis Hopper

    "One should judge a man mainly from his depravities. Virtues can be faked. Depravities are real." -- Klaus Kinski
    Tags: None
  • #2
    You're Batman!

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    • #3
      Had to look this one up on Urban Dictionary:

      1. Person who constantly stays up cleaning, washing, organizing, powertooling, sorting or otherwise keeping themself busy doing menial tasks.
      hmmm, probably not.

      2. Someone who constantly makes slight alterations on (usually a very specific) object, i.e. computer, software, automobile, etc.
      did he want to make alterations on a dog? I doubt it.

      3. A compulsive liar, thief, or both.
      Now we're getting somewhere.

      4. A methamphetamine ("tweak"), or other form of speed, addict (who displays all of the above in an obsessive-compulsive manner).
      Bingo!

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      • #4
        Nicely done.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Lucky View Post
          You're Batman!
          "I lingered round them, under that benign sky: watched the moths fluttering among the heath and harebells, listened to the soft wind breathing through the grass, and wondered how any one could ever imagine unquiet slumbers for the sleepers in that quiet earth."

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          • #6
            The joys of the city life...

            Remember that used correctly, tweakers can be a community asset. I was helping my wife move and she'd already sold her lawnmower...the local tweaker, Larry, came by and offered to mow for 20 bucks. When told that the lawnmower was gone, he said no problem and asked for for a pair of scissors...did the whole lawn with them, small lawn, but still impressive.
            "Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
            - Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

            "Your shitty future continues to offend me."
            -Warren Ellis

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            • #7
              Originally posted by revo View Post
              Had to look this one up on Urban Dictionary:

              1. Person who constantly stays up cleaning, washing, organizing, powertooling, sorting or otherwise keeping themself busy doing menial tasks.
              hmmm, probably not.

              2. Someone who constantly makes slight alterations on (usually a very specific) object, i.e. computer, software, automobile, etc.
              did he want to make alterations on a dog? I doubt it.

              3. A compulsive liar, thief, or both.
              Now we're getting somewhere.

              4. A methamphetamine ("tweak"), or other form of speed, addict (who displays all of the above in an obsessive-compulsive manner).
              Bingo!
              Someone has yet to discover Breaking Bad

              Comment

              • #8
                Originally posted by Hornsby View Post
                The joys of the city life...

                Remember that used correctly, tweakers can be a community asset. I was helping my wife move and she'd already sold her lawnmower...the local tweaker, Larry, came by and offered to mow for 20 bucks. When told that the lawnmower was gone, he said no problem and asked for for a pair of scissors...did the whole lawn with them, small lawn, but still impressive.
                ha ha, one of our local news stations caught the Parks and Rec people paying the park tweaks $10 each to pick up the trash in the park while the city employees kicked back in the shade....
                "You know what's wrong with America? If I lovingly tongue a woman's nipple in a movie, it gets an "NC-17" rating, if I chop it off with a machete, it's an "R". That's what's wrong with America, man...."--Dennis Hopper

                "One should judge a man mainly from his depravities. Virtues can be faked. Depravities are real." -- Klaus Kinski

                Comment

                • #9
                  Originally posted by Fresno Bob View Post
                  ha ha, one of our local news stations caught the Parks and Rec people paying the park tweaks $10 each to pick up the trash in the park while the city employees kicked back in the shade....
                  sos did the city get rid of the overpaid employees and hire the tweakers?
                  "I lingered round them, under that benign sky: watched the moths fluttering among the heath and harebells, listened to the soft wind breathing through the grass, and wondered how any one could ever imagine unquiet slumbers for the sleepers in that quiet earth."

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Fresno Bob View Post
                    I'm on my stoop drinking wine with my dog when tweak stumbles by my house.
                    While I applaud your bravery and quick action, I have to question the responsibility of allowing a canine to imbibe alcohol.

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Trautdiggity View Post
                      While I applaud your bravery and quick action, I have to question the responsibility of allowing a canine to imbibe alcohol.
                      Tell that to Brian.

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Trautdiggity View Post
                        While I applaud your bravery and quick action, I have to question the responsibility of allowing a canine to imbibe alcohol.
                        You're questioning FB? Someone's looking to get thumblocked!
                        I always liked Alfonseca and he is twice the pitcher Hall of Famer Mordecai Brown was - cavebird 12-8-05
                        You'd be surprised on how much 16 months in a federal pen can motivate you - gashousegang 7-31-06
                        "...That said, the hippo will always be the gold standard here" - Heyelander's VD XII avatar analysis of SeaDogStat 1-29-07
                        It's surprising that attempts to coordinate large groups of socially retarded people would end in this kind of chaos. - Cobain's Ghost 12-19-07

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by SeaDogStat View Post
                          You're questioning FB? Someone's looking to get thumblocked!
                          just for that, I might have to bounce a little when I'm sitting on him so he gets some extra pavement love...
                          "You know what's wrong with America? If I lovingly tongue a woman's nipple in a movie, it gets an "NC-17" rating, if I chop it off with a machete, it's an "R". That's what's wrong with America, man...."--Dennis Hopper

                          "One should judge a man mainly from his depravities. Virtues can be faked. Depravities are real." -- Klaus Kinski

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Chillin' on a stoop is the one thing I absolutely miss about SF.

                            Comment

                            • #15


                              Lyrics NSFW.
                              Originally posted by Kevin Seitzer
                              We pinch ran for Altuve specifically to screw over Mith's fantasy team.

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